Stigma

You know we are taught to be the one in everything we do. Always the best in everything. And because we cant live up to these “expectations”, we get depressed and disappointed with ourselves. Even with our lives sometimes.  Let me clear the stats here. See, every one of us is extraordinary and expert in one or two things in life. Apart from these things, we are pretty average at almost everything. Now, Its human tendency to see either the best or the absolute worst in all things. Therefore, as most of the times, we see the absolute best.  For example, I’m pretty sure we all know Steve Jobs and look up to him for bringing a revolution in the field of information technology and blessing us all with his company’s products. The first word that would come up to your mind when I say his name would be “revolutionary”, “genius”, “hardworking” and even “iPhone”. As I said, the human tendency of seeing the area a person has expertise in. But how many of you thought of ...

Sometimes the world and the society convinces me that I’m wrong for the way I think, for the way I believe in things, for the way I love. There are days when these comments fill up my head making me feel disappointed with myself. I start pointing out flaws in myself and eventually get depressed and anxious about my entire existence. I begin overthinking. I begin doing things that I wouldn’t normally do to please others. I begin hating myself. I begin feeling as though I’m living a ‘wrong’ life. These opinions of the people and the society start messing with my thoughts and my faith. However, I try to remind myself that- this is MY life. I am not supposed to follow others’ path or others’ way of living. It doesn’t matter if I don’t have determined goals. It doesn’t matter if I fail to make everyone like me. It isn’t necessary for me to fulfill others’ desires. It doesn’t matter if my definition of a happy life is different than others. It doesn’t matter if I am better or worse than ...

Some may say I live a crazy life because I don’t live the way others do. I don’t dream the way others do. Happiness has a different meaning to me. My idea of success does not match with others. I believe in enjoying life and living the way I want to rather than planning every next step. Future haunts me. I don’t try to control my future. I don’t have any plans for my future. I don’t study hard. I am always nagged by my family.  Growing up, I thought how great it would be to become a teenager. Well, I’ll just say it isn’t what I expected. When I thought about my teen years, I always imagined a happy, young and free me. Not a manipulated-by-the-societal-expectations me. It is so hypocritical of people. They first tell us to live life the way we want to and do what you love and then, they frown upon our decisions. They say “be you” and then, judge us. I thought future was something to be excited about, despite of not being aware of what is ahead. I thought the main goal in life ...

Sit back and ask yourself, why are you doing what you are doing? Is it for yourself or is it for others. see, I believe its good to make others happy but you should not do that at the cost of making yourself suffer. You don’t have to put on a mask just to make those around you happy. Its not your job to make everyone happy. however, its your duty to take care of your soul. Do what you feel like you need to. If you’re feeling down, you don’t have to force yourself into going out. spend time with yourself, maybe watch a movie. Don’t worry about how they will feel if you cancel the plan. If they really care about you, they will understand. I am the type of person that would sacrifice my well being just because it makes people happy. I have always done that because I thought I was helping others. But you know what, that just degraded me because I started feeling attached to them and having those expectations of them.  I used to pretend to be happy when really I was depressed. ...

I feel myself changing. You ever felt that. Its like I am two complete different people and I don’t know which one is the real me. One of it wants to get work done, study,  go out, work towards my goals, be productive. But the other one makes me feel worthless and disappointed in myself every time I try to do something. Its true anxiety and depression make the worst combination. I have no control of whats going on. I know some people might have it worse than me but that does not make my pain any less valid. It feels like an endless circle of weakness, sadness, disappointment and worthlessness. I cant tell if its killing me or making me stronger. I always try to control things but it ends up controlling me. I should stop just let go of things that I cant control and give it all to Him. And so should y’all. I’m the person who talks people into self-love. I truthfully assure everyone how wonderful they are, because I don’t want people to feel the way I do right now. I unintentiona...

Why do we keep holding onto people who hurt us over and over again? They love and care about us and so do we but still they keep tearing our hearts apart by the little things they do everyday. I understand they might be important but why do we keep giving them the power to break us apart? The problem is we grow so attached to some people that we start depending on them. We feel like our world revolves around them . We go to extents just to keep them close. And its not wrong to have such close relationships. Note that by relationships, I mean not just the boyfriend-girlfriend relationship but your relationship with your friends or family, etc. However, relationships should not be so intense that you start losing yourself in order to pursue them. That is toxic. You need to let go of the rose if its branch makes your fingers bleed. Just because its beautiful does not mean you have to tolerate the pain of getting stabbed by its thorns. There are plenty of alternatives to this rose. Rem...